This is not a post.
Well, it is, but it also sort of isn’t.
This is an intro.
An intro that is longer than an intro and so gets its own post even though it’s actually just an intro and so therefore not really a post.
Oh well. On to the meat of the matter…
First though, a little reiteration:
I am a virgin. And despite what popular media and society at large may feel, say or do, I’m unashamed about it.
This is of course stale gist to most of the people reading this. For those to whom this, however, IS news, I ‘announced’ it in a post titled Losing My Virginity sometime last year. I clearly stated then what the reasons for which I was declaring it were.
Thanks to that post, many have felt comfortable enough to open up to me concerning their varying views and/or issues concerning sex and, in a few cases, sexuality. I count it privilege and am deeply honoured anyone would trust me with such delicate information or with giving them any sort of advice. I’ve also found these discussions very enlightening, probably even more enlightening than the light-bearers who come seeking light from one who boasts of bearing no light. You may not have known of the light you bore, but thank you for your light *shakes off fairy dust* (Who talks that way? :s ) I certainly hope I have been helpful in some way or the other. I try my best not to judge anyone for mistakes made, their ideologies or decisions. Same way I asked that no one judge, dismiss or look down upon others (virgins in particular here) for making the choice(s) they have made.
A few people have admitted to me to also being virgins. People who would get the same kinds of reactions I got if the word got out…
“Stop playing jor”
“If you wan lie, lie better lie. No be dis one”
In opening up to me, they also admit they are wary of saying it in public or even to friends of theirs because of the embarrassment or even ridicule it may attract. *sigh* We have a long way to go, I guess…
If there’s one thing I appreciate from that experience, it’s that I’ve since then been approached on the subject of abstinence and virginity largely with respect and tolerance, (as against the condescending attitude such a conversation would have previously evoked) which is part of what I hoped to achieve by writing that post. Hopefully, this same respect and tolerance is being extended to others too.
But something was missing in that post and it was obvious enough that I’ve been asked about it in nearly every conversation I’ve had on the matter since the post went up. The question:
“Why did you choose to remain a virgin?”
Another frequent question is:
“Do you plan to stay this way till you get married”
Due to space constraints and consideration for the views of some of the audience I expected on Losing My Virginity, I didn’t really address those questions in that post. They will now be addressed.
But not by me.
I was having a conversation on the issue of abstinence with a new friend when she eventually, as expected, asked me the earlier stated questions. I answered and then she went on to state her own views on the matter which impressed me to the point that I asked her to please write a sequel to my earlier post. She obliged, thankfully. This post-which-is-not-a-post is an intro to that post.
A warning though, and to a large extent, the reason for this intro/post. The Sequel is heavily laced with christian views and biblical references. If you choose to avoid these, we respect your decision. We respect the fact that everyone has a right to their opinions and beliefs, as do we, and we’re not trying to preach at anyone. Only to share our thoughts on the subject and answer previously asked questions. This is not Ladun Ikeji’s blog (pun intended). We are not looking to be sensationalist or to get insulted for what we believe in.
Peace to all men.
And to each his own.
If you’re christian, or you’re not but are open to seeing what our views on the subject are, you’re welcome to read The Sequel.