I Forgot

I forgot how to write.

It didn’t matter that I was a writer. Or that I was a blogger. Or that I did not lack inspiration; nor motivation for that matter. I had forgotten how to write and that was that.

Countless times, I was sat in front of the computer and toyed with the keys. Caressed them till they were warm with the touch of my fingers. Rested my palms atop them and watched gibberish spew unto the screen; no deliberate words ever amongst the gibberish. Sometimes, following the gibberish, a few words which bore some meaning or other would slip out. They would glitter and sparkle with potential and my mind would toy with what to make of/from them. And before my very eyes, said sparkle and glitter would fizzle out, leaving nothing but a dull ache where the potential once was.

Back space.

Many-a-time, I would flick open my twitter app and scroll through the timeline. I would find something to laugh about and begin to RT it, adding a big, fat “Lol”. Then I would catch myself and hit delete. I would lurk in the shadows imagining brilliant commentary for ongoing bants, and then never allow the comment beyond the realm of my imagination. I would stalk my crush(es) and then close their tabs without so much as a little flirting. I’d refuse to reply tweets or DMs directed at me. And many rants would go unranted upon…

Because I’d forgotten how to write…

And a deadline I committed to had passed. And the person to whom the commitment was made is the person whose tweet I would have loved to Lol, but couldn’t. And the rant I would have loved to rant was about having forgotten how to write… but a tweet is written, is it not? How then do I justify said rant to them upon the TL?

I’m writing this piece because I have forgotten how to write.

The irony of writing and the inability to do so is that there is one sort-of widely-known solution: Write either way. So that is what I am doing now… writing either way. For you must know, that even though these are not the words I mean to write, words must be written. And perhaps if I am unable to write the words I wish to, writing these would help pave the way for the ones I hope to write. Yes?

Well, that’s what they say.

I wrote this piece to remind myself how to write.

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