I had great hopes for 2015, it was supposed to be the year, that year, when all the pieces of the puzzle miraculously fell into place and clicked out a perfect picture, it was supposed to be that year when I found out how to utilize my potential and churn out exceptional products, that year when I finally learnt to discipline my mind, and my body, curb my excesses and live fit, happy and successful. Alas, I ended the year 2015 unfit, unhappy and unsuccessful. 2015 definitely had its moments; don’t get me wrong, several false dawns, a couple of Firsts, a few good friends and some truly enjoyable moments, but the whole is a sum of its parts.
Hold up, hold up… I already feel depressed writing about my year, this was not the plan. Well in 2015, I learnt to be grateful, to be grateful for every breath you take, to be grateful for every word you (can) speak and those you (cannot) don’t, for every sincere friend you have and the not so sincere ones, for every moment you were appreciated and even in the moments you aren’t. I learnt that the only way to not commit suicide or die from depression is to live gratefully or is it in gratitude?Whatever.
In 2015, I thought of death more often than ever. No, I wasn’t thinking of committing suicide, I just found myself thinking of death, peaceful death, protracted death, violent death. Maybe it’s because I worked in a hospital for a huge chunk of the year; I also found myself staring the fear of failure in the face so many times that there were days I just curled up on my bed and did nothing but play games while feeling like an unaccomplished piece of putrid poo.
In 2015, I had a number of good friendships just cool down all of a sudden, and no matter how hard I tried to revive the friendship or put some life back into it, it felt like I was trying to punch a hole in a wall made of steel, with my head. In the end, I felt I was always the desperate one, clinging to a wisp of smoke, a memory of what had been. I guess I learnt to deal with loss.
2016 is going to be a much better year for me than 2015 was. In 2016, I hope to:
- Learn graphic design finally
- Get my first book published
- Blog more often, I also hope more people read my blog
- Grow spiritually. 2015 wasn’t a good year for me spiritually.
- Tell more people about Jesus
- Increase my income, and create a third income stream
- End the year with a weight of 70Kg maximum
- Cherish family and friends more than ever. I’m on a ‘one I love you daily’ plan where I tell at least one person I love them everyday
- Be very, very happy.
I pray for you guys that 2016 will be your best year yet, a year of self-realization, fulfillment, career advancement, love, good health, peace, joy, a closer relationship with God. You’ll end the year with testimonies, fam. Peace.
It’s always a pleasure and an inspiration to see people rise beyond “…the previous year didn’t work out quite like I hoped” and go on to hope against hope and scribe well laid plans for the new year. Seun is certainly no exception to this.
I agree with you, Seun. 2016 is going to be a much better year for you than 2015 was. Amen.