Dusk 30: Kenenimchuckwu

Kenenimchukwu

I never was one for New Year Resolutions. After many pathetic  attempts at saying this year I’d be better and this and that and I’ll do this and that- I pretty much gave up and decided to take each year as it comes. So I’m going to take this year as it comes.

Fin.

My post should end here but it won’t. So if you really are interested beyond the boring first paragraph, here is a list of things I’m going to take as it comes this year.

Learning to Drive.

For the umpteenth time, I will get behind a wheel. My first attempt at driving successfully was in 2009. I had mastered the art of being at the wheel and driving with one arm and throwing a gang sign with the other. Then I decided to take my younger brothers out. And they were, of course driving from the back seat and I was feeling like the elder sister who ‘could drive’ and yelling at them to cut it out. In all but a split second, I looked to the back to tell the little gremlins to shut it- when they screamed ‘Woman, Brake! Brake! Brake!’ I looked in front of me- and Alas! There was this old woman staring petrified and immobile, smack dab in the middle of the road. My legs, however decided that the brake was the accelerator, so as they screamed brake! My leg went accelerator! I stopped just in time. Well, short of taking out the woman’s abdominal cavity.  After screams of ‘Aunty, you see me for your dream? And reassuring the woman that I didn’t dream of her the night before, I dumped the car keys. Haven’t driven since. Well, I picked up the keys last year. This year, I will drive.  Or take life as it comes. Whatever.

Learning to Love

So, I entered the year with the whole ‘I want to love myself, I really don’t have time for the ‘wahala’ that comes with men and all of that. And I’m really not looking for love this year. Three failed relationships can do that to you. I used to say that the only person I would ever date was my future husband. God, you can stop laughing now.  I will take it as it comes. The whole issue of love, that is. Agape love is the best though. I can tell you that for free.

Learning to Learn

This year, I want to be better. Do better. Read more. Pray more. Learn more. Be with God more. I tottered away from God a bit after a series of unfortunate events in my personal life but now, I am back. Holding on, and I’m not letting go again. Baba God, your girl is loyal. 

I have written a film this year already and January ends today. This year, I want to write like crazy and learn how to direct. Nigeria needs more female directors with a good head on their shoulders. My mother still does not know what my ‘career’ path is. To be honest, sometimes, I don’t know either. She was thinking that after my Msc. I’ll get a ‘job’ and bring plenty a bullion van of money home. Well, this is it.

Have you seen Africa’s local newspaper? The HobbingPost? Visit http://www.hobbingpost.com for more information.  Along with a team of amazing, out-of-this-world individuals, we are slowly trying to build a news portal that will rival all others (great PSA or what? I know, right?). This year, HobPost TV has already sort of taken off. Have to learn to be better at that as well. Watch that space. Something big is coming.

This year, I also decided I was going to do a Phd. In Film and History. Have to find a proper research topic to pursue this year. Why does a potential film maker need a Phd, some may say? No reason, just because I can folks, just because I can.

I’m also keen on writing a children’s book this year. The first book in a series of children’s books.  Maybe, I’m not sure. Okay, I am. This year, I will stop procrastinating and write the book. Or take life as it comes. Whatever.  Write the book, Fifi.

I am also dabbling with publishing for others. My first client’s book is giving me hell, but if I can get through this, I can get through anything.

And the last major thing I have to learn this year? Manage my charity. I run a volunteer based charity- ‘IneffableEuphoria’ that does food drives in Ebute which is around Odo Eran in Bariga. For those of you who are lost, if you look off the Third Mainland Bridge at those fishing villages that are not Makoko? Yeah…those ones.  This year, I would love to take it up a notch. Even though the main idea is a soup kitchen and a homeless shelter, one cannot afford that yet. This year, we will have a soup kitchen on wheels, before the major food drive.

I don’t believe in New Year Resolutions. These are just the various ways I am going to take life as it comes this year. I ramble. If you got to the end of this post, thank you. Now, accept my sincere apology.

Day 30: Niro

This post is going to be unusually long, so here’s a TL;DR version:

2-niro-30-days-of-hope

This year, I just want to live.

That paragraph above was all that I intended to write and call it a day, but then I discovered that when you write exactly what you need to achieve, it becomes more than just wishful thinking and becomes a plan.

So this year, I want to have a plan, and see it through. I’m tired of having to make backup plans because I’ve failed somewhere and I need to regroup and make other plans while feeling like I’ve lost the whole world, that’s not what the Niro do, I do the opposite.

Top of the list of what I have to achieve this year, is getting back into school. I’m not supposed to be trying to get into school, but when you’re 600km from home and rely on someone else to get the job done for you, this is where you find yourself. Unlike last year when I got the chance on a platter, now I have to take exams upon exams and secure graduate admission myself.

This year, I want to bond with my siblings. Okay that’s being too expectant, so I’ll be content with bonding with half of them or maybe a dozen. I finally moved back to Port Harcourt in September last year, and more than ever I want to be there for as many people as I can to fulfill my role as the last son when they need help with doing stuff and in return get them to stop seeing me as the renegade who wants things his way and would stop at nothing to get it.

I want to go back into DJing. I’ve already started and I’m enjoying every bit of it, and  by the time you’ll be reading this, I’ll be on my way to DJ at my boss’ son’s birthday party.

If you’re still reading this, it’s okay to take a pause and visit playbookutunu.wordpress.com because that’s where I want to write at least 30 blog posts this year. I want to improve on my writing ability as well my presentation skills, so here’s my cry for help; if you know how this writing thing is done, leave me a comment, I’ll be happy to be your student.

This year I don’t have to make 14 hour trips across the country, but I’d have to look for a way to travel at least twice every quarter. I’m even thinking of doing a West African tour, but all that will be depending on a lot of other factors, I can’t remember who it was, but someone said she was interested on here, please when you’re ready. I’m a DM away at @DJNIRO84.

I’ve always wanted to make a business out of providing media services and that’s what I intend to do with Onrun Media Limited. It might take time, but guys need to build the Condé Nast of Nigeria and I’m not going to bank on someone else to do it while I watch. So guys, please tell a friend to tell a friend.

It’s safe to say this is the year I’m deciding to feed my gadget craze. I want to own the gadgets that drive me crazy, top of which is a camera drone. It’ll be cool to take overhead pictures of people on the pitch at a TPL event without them knowing who’s controlling the camera *evil grin*, I also want to own a DSLR, Mac Pro or Mac Mini and at least one very large HD display amongst many other addictions. So if you’re touched to send me one for my birthday, let yourself be an instrument of blessing to me 😀

Lastly, I want to continue making awesome stuff for The TPL and I’m hoping that I can have the team I’ve worked with for a very long time as we change how you watch live football.

PS: If you have branding needs to fulfill, just send an email to niro@nirobertram.com. I’m talking logos, flyers and next level integrated branding stuff.

Dark 29: Ashiwel

Dear 2015,
 
We can make war, or we can be friends; you can pledge your allegiance to my peace, or force me to seize it from your minutes as they fall at my feet. Either way, I will win. I always win.
 
Forgive my manners; I should introduce myself. I am the plaintive mess you inherited from last year, bowed but unbroken, resilient spirit chained to dreams I refused to give up. My name is Ashiwel.
 
I have got dreams, Mr. 2015, if you must know. I have got plenty of dreams. 
 
I want to write until my soul unbreaks. I want publish a book of poems maybe, to see my words go places I’ll probably never have the chance to go. 
 
I want to happen on humanity and be surprised in a good way by its depth, and breadth and profundity. I want to meet more strangers, and have random conversations, and find my laughter in the laughter of others. I hope too for friends that may stick closer than brothers.
 
I was never one to take the easy road, and my paths have never been paved. Perhaps I recognize my tests as the fire that forges the steel blade of my character. And so I do not hope for a lighter burden, but for stronger shoulders instead. I hope that I can bear my burdens, and my neighbor’s too, and not sink under their collective weight.
 
I hope for great grace and small mercies; the familiar, overlooked small mercies that make life beautiful. I hope that I can save myself from myself when the occasion calls for a savior. 
 
And I hope for peace. May our soldiers go home to their families once more. May our children go home to walk the lands they once walked, and sleep in familiar beds. May our nation find leaders worthy of their offices and the esteem in which we hold them.
 
I hope that I can learn new things, or re-learn old things in new ways. I hope that I can unlearn my inability to regularly communicate or express myself emotionally, and learn from time to time to prefer the discomfiture of company to the comfort zone that is solitude. I hope that I can grow into the man that all of this promise poured into me begs of me.
 
I hope, when the world suffers a color demise, that someone will find these words, and maybe find color in them.
 
Dear 2015, I’d like to be friends. Please be kind to me.
 
Sincerely,
 
Ashiwel.
@iamashiwel

Dusk 29: Mansu

I was almost not going to ‘bother’ myself with writing this, but how do I go all out this year already?

I’ll start by putting a cap on the previous year. Chai, that year was just one kind. There was too much money learning going down. I learned and earned not much. Learnt how not to set too many goals and how to successfully be a victim of online scam. Apart from the fact that I was mostly broke and frequently unhappy, it was a year of plenty ‘strategic’ plans (my manager’s fav words) and preparations for a better 2015.

So, here goes:

Be Bold.

On the 30th day of January, I take a long walk out of misery my job into happiness or reality as some call it. This significantly is the beginning of this year for me. I had counted down for long, prepared, anticipated and wait for it… waited for the 30th of January for so many reasons. I honestly haven’t felt better than I have been feeling in the past few days, knowing I’m swaying into the not-so-friendly world.

This year, I’ll make my points known, ask when I need to and say NO (to rape, violence and lending), a few times!

Travel.

New York. Ontario. Bradford. Abu Dhabi. Mecca. As much as my pocket (and of family and friends) can bear mehn, that world tour will finally begin, at least this five. I’ll travel for work, holidays, just because and because.

Do.

I have had this long dream of being a radio presenter. Oh yes!  I have the ‘radio-voice’. This year I am actually going to get on the radio, and anchor my own programme. So, if you know how you can make this dream come true, be nice!

I am also going to act more on my ideas. Y’all don’t know a thing about exhaustion – my ideas kill me.  ‘OurWeddingStoryNigeria’ (which I presently co-own) will run *wink at Tunde*, ‘UpBeat Youth’ will fly, ‘Incomplete Words of Mansu’ will jump and ‘BuyAfricana’ will kill take you all!

Give.

This is what ENTREPRENEURS do. My entire doable are very open to individuals and groups of people who want to be engaged in one thing or the other, so simply indicate your interest and let’s go ALL out together!!! And I mean it.

I have recently registered a rather unconventional non-profit and hope to engage as many fun young people as the universe has. I need to start touching lives and will do just that. I am moving from empathy to filling and fulfilling.

Love.

Who knew holidays could be so tiring. Love is a beautiful thing and I am going to feel it. #ThatsALL.

Cook.

Because I am certain that at some point in some people’s lives they’ll get to read this,  I won’t start by saying I LOVE to cook (I do tho), but I am going to reeeeeeeaaaalllyyyyy cook this year. We’ll do traditional, intercontinental, international, universal, heavenly, everything and anything. That’s actually preparing towards Africurean (wait for that too).

Save.

I am not exactly sure to add this to the list, I mean. I hope to try though.

So there goes a euphemism for my six plus one goals for the year 2015: TO GO ALL OUT!!!

Thank you Ola for giving me the opportunity and thank YOU for reading through these 570 words.

Hit ‘em Up:

@EmmCrystal

I.G: missaduke

Missaduke.wordpress.com

Monsurahaduke@gmail.com

Day 29: Aminat

November 2012 decided to leave taking my mum with it. Someone I had just started bonding fully with. She was gone and nothing would bring her back. And Oh did mankind deal us a terrible blow too. Fast forward- December 2012 and my resolutions were: Care less (People aren’t worth it)  And be a lot less responsible (I always was that person who’d give her arm and leg for someone else’s work even as I died while doing it). Oh yeah, try passing all your exams in January.

January came and passed and so did 2013. No…. I did not pass my exams and No again, I did not become less responsible. Although, I did become cold, distant and lived behind walls. Growing up for me was fast…this whole thing made me wife and mother before I could blink.

2014 was “DIFFERENT”. Everything was different. Everything that could have gone wrong did. Some got better. I did things I never would have thought I would. I became less cold and distant…Ahmean, I almost cried when that lady in The Best Man Holiday died… I even got a tear drop or two while watching The Fault in our stars (Okay so I really cried…Movie none-criers like me are allowed some cry-time no?). I started writing again (sort of. Although I did take a break of about 8 months to finish the blog-series I started in December 2013 but I did finish up. I made me proud).   meenahsthoughts.wordpresss.com came to life (yeah yeah, you got me there. Do visit, comment, and subscribe). Progress is slow but then again, I am making an effort this time. I got amazing offers towards the end of the year. Ah!  How could I forget, I became a plantain “dealer” too.

My Plan of Action for this year is quite a long list. Too long I don’t know if I can keep up.

This year I just want to be happy. I hope to be happy. Do things because I can…Laugh a lot more and this time from my heart. Worry less. Stop blaming myself for everything that goes wrong. Stop blaming myself for mum.

Salvage my grades and finish school with as good a grade as possible. Last semester’s results just came in….Things are looking good. It is hard bouncing back from that much carry-overs but God has been wonderful. My GP still fit call number small before credit go finish.

I do hope to become more serious with my writing. Getting myself into trouble by committing to write for someone by a deadline worked once, it should work again. The goal is to write at least thrice in a week (which I sadly haven’t started doing), so help me God.  Take up script-writing and start those manuscripts I have refused to start writing, get my blog running fully.

Self-development: I have to take my sewing seriously this year. Start my training afresh, get a sewing machine. It’s time to stop just talking about a media career and start acting on it.  And all those “I want to- I want to” things I’ve been eyeing and forgetting, it’s time to do at least one of them. And by all means, if I can become a certified JCI Trainer this year, why not?!

Volunteer. How to go about it, I don’t know. But I do hope to. There are already some amazing projects JCI OAU has planned for this LO year. I don’t want to be limited to just JCI. I’m hoping to start a Spoken Words gig on campus. I hope this doesn’t end as just another project I thought of. 

No plans for ‘Bae’ this year. It’s just me this year. No such thing as trying to find The One or hoping The Right One would happen along this time. (My friends won’t let me hear the end of this. They’ll make it a really long year).

No more free hair for anybody. Well, except my family and my friends and maybe a couple other people. *sigh* that’s everybody already. See how my resolutions don’t make it to February talk more December?

Meet more people. Online…Offline…Anyline (@09_Eleven is the handle by the way). I would be much more of a Pest than before (time to upgrade).

Make my Dad even prouder than he already is. Be a better daughter, wife, and mother. The poor man and my siblings deserve it.

This long list is yet another thing I hope for. I hope to complete this list of “Dares” by the end of the year. Amen.

Day 28: Tiki

To be honest, I forgot that I signed up for this project. That is, until Toxic sent me a reminder. This does not bode well for my 2015 resolutions already, but *blows kiss* thanks Ola darling.

I chose the 28th because it has a special significance for me – on the 28th of whatever-month-that-was, I met a kindred spirit. One of only three i’ve met in my almost-three decades on earth. The first turned out to be a colossal mistake, the second is as close to me as a married male can be, and this one…after a long time, I finally feel excited by someone other than myself. (lol, no pun intended I promise)

2014 was an amazing year for me. I bought my first car (allow me a minute to gloat…a Benz Kompressor! Sadly, it is currently at the mechanic’s, lol). I took a leap of faith by leaving my first job ever, to a new company with a much bigger role, in spite of soooo many people trying to hold me back by telling me I wasn’t ready, couldn’t cope, and my new boss had a reputation of being a monster. I attended my first #TNC meetup, became an avid follower of #HumansOfNewYork (you really should check them out on FB and IG and the blog too!). I took control of my Christian life, instead of letting the spiritual affiliations of people I respect sway me. I reorganized my priorities, redefined my goals…and walked into 2015 debt-free.

Please if I owe you and you are reading this, I haven’t forgotten you. Month-end abeg. Lol.

I’m really looking forward to 2015. I have a few very concise resolutions up on my blog www.tiki2a.wordpress.com, but that isn’t all I wanna do with my life. I’ve got soo many other plans, like

I want to build a house. You heard me right. It’s not about wanting to measure up to anything. It’s about wanting to take up a mammoth challenge, one I know I have a good chance at winning. It’s ok if I don’t finish, but I have to start. That’s the plan.

I want to travel more. I already travel a lot, but I want to up the ante. There is so much to discover out there, and I want to see it. I’m going to hit a never-before continent this year.

If I can only save the money. *sigh*<

I want to pray more. Recently I feel like I'm too busy to pray, really pour my heart out to God you know? It gives a peace like no other, and I need that. I'm getting a few books on that.

I want to be part of something life-changing. I want to do something important for someone in need. I don't mean give a few notes to a hungry person. I mean empower someone who has no hope. Inspire some one who needs guidance. Be about more than me. Believe it or not, you'd think that with the plethora of orphanages out there this would be easy, but it isn't. I want to be more than a line in a balance sheet which says 'Donation received from…'. I want to do good that will last. *cue in HONY and #Vidal #Brownsville*

Oooh, one I'm very excited about… I want to reacquaint myself with African literature! Currently I've got a 75-book strong list which I'm goin to put up on my blog soon!, and i'm looking to acquire all (hard copy please, electronics are not as much fun are they? There's something about the smell of ink…). I don't know where to look though. Someone pointed me in the direction of Latana but I haven't been there yet.

I want to learn patience. And trust. And hope. And develop my spirit of discernment. The need for these ones has already made itself felt in 2015, but it's looking good. Psalm 46:10 is becoming my mantra.

I want to be outstanding at my job. It's very gratifying that after just a few months I'm getting all these solicitations, but somehow some of the time I still feel like there's so much I need to know. Need to do. Need to be good at. I'm working on that though. More exposure, more training, more school. Yeuch.

And finally, the one thing I KNOW I'm gonna do this year. This year, I'm going to love with abandon. I'm going to throw caution to the wind, take a leap of faith and lose myself in the feeling of seeing someone as the person who completes me into being a better version of myself. I'm going to remind myself of how beautiful life is when you share it with the right someone. It doesn't matter what happens at the end, but in 2015, I'm going to love with every fibre of my being.

Cheers to 2015!

Dusk 27: Shirley

I tend to get overwhelmed by the sheer size of my dreams and I begin to second guess myself; my confidence becomes shaky and I make questionable decisions. In 2015 I hope to cut that shit out.

No. I INTEND to cut that shit out!

Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”

In 2015, I intend to do more than hope, I intend to walk by faith. I have played it reasonably safe the past couple of years. I’m not a gambler, I refused to take big risks because I didn’t want to have to deal with the hurt. In the past, I had taken a huge risk and lost… and it hurt like hell. Then the most amazing thing happened, I didn’t die. I’m still here and I’m still awesome.

Faith & fear both demand you believe in something you cannot see. You choose!

— BOB PROCTOR

I choose Faith

When the thing you fear the most happens, then you come out on the other side… when you survive the thing you were sure would break you, when the hurt begins to subside and begin to realise you’ll be fine, fear loses its grip over you. Freedom.

Desperation and anxiety creates an unwanted bias in the decision making process. Tunnel vision; inability to see the bigger picture. Again, I need to cut that shit out. Faith cannot exist alongside worry and anxiety. Everything good will come.This knowledge is the the secret to peace of mind; the holy grail.

You know that saying about how you will continue to repeat life’s lessons until you learn what you need to grow? Well, 2014 was about learning my lessons. I had to repeat a few classes but I think I nailed it this time. People will leave, but they will be replaced. No one is indispensable. You will make mistakes, you’ll do better next time. You will be disappointed, you’ll be delighted  . You will hurt. You will Lose. And you will be fine.

And it will all be worth it.

“...you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.”

I aced my classes, so bring on the advanced lessons!

In 2015 I intend to take all of the risks; personal growth, career, relationships… also, the guitar and swimming lessons are way overdue.

Shalom!

Day 27: Nike

I JUST WANT TO LIVE!

Like everyone else I tend to begin my year with resolutions. For different years I have planned to get a new job, keep fit, further my education and the constant grow deeper in my faith. I am a planner and overanalyser and I always have my plans written down with timelines in a little book that goes everywhere with me.

This year is different. I rang in 2015 with so much joy and happiness in my church with only one unwritten resolution, “I just want to live!”

I have a habit of naming my years (I got this from the yearly pentecostal church themes) and these names have helped with understand each phase of life I find myself in.

2013 was my defining year. My Dad who I loved more than life, loved more than I love myself, who to me was only second to God Almighty passed on. Each time I felt like my world was over and I had no reason to live I repeated to myself that 2013 was my defining year and that the rest of my life was going to be determined by how I handled my Dad’s death. I lived.

I have lovingly referred to 2014 as my year of patience because it was in this year I knew first hand about the frailty of our human body. I began 2014 with high hopes, expecting that I would achieve all that I was unable to achieve in 2013 due to the loss and mourning of my Dad but this was not to be. 28th January 2014 was the scariest day of my life. I went into the operating theatre for the first time in my life. I found myself unable to do the simplest of tasks and getting out was a chore. My human body failed me in so many ways that sometimes I wondered if it wasn’t easier to just lie down and die. I was diagnosed with an invisible illness (I wrote about it here) and I am slowly recovering from its effects on my body and learning to live with the condition.

This is my year of self. I will put myself before others and pay more attention to my personal needs. I grew up having to think about others and how my actions affects those close to me and I a lot of the time pleased others to my own detriment. I will eat healthy and take care of my body, good health is wealth and that can never be overstated. I want to enjoy this year as much as I can; I want to go on the vacations I couldn’t enjoy last year because I was unable to travel. I have decided to lend my voice to create awareness for the disease I suffer and I look forward to helping others deal with the ailment. But most of all I want to love myself and accept that even in my weakness and frailty I am very much loved by God.

I just want to live!

Dark 26: Nimi

First off my apologies to the creator of this challenge which I enjoy very much. I’ve been so in my head that I missed out my day and he’s been kind enough to fit me in.


My 30 days of hope will actually be summed up in one sentence so let me drag things out a little bit an give a review on 2014:

‘Facing my spirituality head on, away from the trappings of religion.’ Yeeeaaah so I did have some moments of spiritual awakening and…ha, I couldn’t even finish that. I feel like I’m in a little bit more turmoil about this than for reasons that may be clear by the end of this post.

‘Write more, go for every writing opportunity available to me, improve, create variety, and put myself out there
.’ Hmm… Let’s just say I will be better this year.

“Dear Body, you have served me incredibly well. I should treat you better.” I am so much more aware of what I’m doing to this body of mine. I still need to do so much better though but now I’m all about putting ish into practice.

“Be as good to those around me as they are to me.”  I was good about this 2014, I will be better in 2015. You just don’t know what’s around the corner.

“Stop enjoying life and go get married.” I think the sentence I put there was ‘to be in a situation that will encourage that special one on one partnership.’ 2014 was a good year for it… and it was all with A LOT of enjoyment 😉

“To keep challenging myself to step out of my comfort zone.”
My big thing in 2014 ended up being something completely unexpected. I hosted an erotic poetry event, never in life would I have thought I’d do that (yeah I know you’re surprised especially after my chosen genre in writing). Public speaking is not something I like at all (I tried to choose my university modules based on the lack of presentation involved) but the opportunity came and I said a hesitant yes. I’m so glad I did…so ‘yes!’ to more in 2015.

So what is my hope for 2015?

To be happy. To live

I lost my mum in November 2014, this upcoming weekend will be when her body is put to the ground. I feel like my heart stopped as soon as I heard the news. I feel like it hasn’t really started again. Like I’m living without realising, just coasting, going through the motions. One of the reasons I wanted to do this piece was for it to remind me of the good things in 2014, and there were… they just rarely come to mind. I did some great things, I met some amazing people but all that doesn’t seem to matter because I can’t get past November 2014. It feels like my whole year began and ended with that date. So for 2015, I want to feel happy again, I want to live again, I want my heart to start beating again. It is what I want & I know for sure it’ll be what she wants. Mama was way too vivacious to allow a small thing like death stop her fun, so why should I.

Here’s to 2015, a year of living, of happiness and of hope. Make sure you enjoy it to the best of your ability. If you don’t know how, start with a shot of tequila 😉

Dusk 26: Bukky

2014 was not what I thought it would be. I had a lot of low moments; I cried, I learnt a lot about life and myself. For me, 70% of the things I hoped for did not happen. However, the high moments even though few, overshadowed the low moments. I got married to my friend of over 10 years. I moved out of Lagos to be with Le hubs. I joined an organization in December 2013, so I had the whole of 2014 to learn and grow. Growth process is never easy but it was definitely worth it. I met people, I learnt to smile even when everything around me was crumbling. Most importantly, I learnt to trust God. You know, you’ve never really trusted if you’ve never been tested. When you are at your lowest, that’s when you know what it really means to trust, to be without a plan B, to put all your eggs in a basket. Ah, yes, I learnt to love and receive love without questions.

In spite of all these, I’m thankful for love, for life and for all things beautiful that God has blessed me with.

So, what do I want out of 2015?

My theme for this year is, ‘to be deliberate.’ Yeah, you got that right. I’m tired of being a shadow of my old self. I’m tired of wanting something and saying another. I’m tired of allowing life to just happen. This year, nothing is going to happen by chance. That is not to say I don’t want to be surprised, pleasant surprises are always welcome. However, I will not sit and wait for it.

I want to be deliberate in helping people. For this, I want to support at least three children this year. I will pay their school fees and buy books and whatever they need in school. I think I’ve found two but if you know this special child that requires assistance, biko holla. okunolabukky@yahoo.com is the address. Terms and conditions apply though. lol

I want to be happy, deliberately. I want to go out more. Enough of my ‘no time to waste time’ story. Go out I must this year. Whatever makes me happy, that I’ll do.

I want to be more disciplined. The MD/CEO of a Nigerian Bank once said and I quote, ‘the first step to being disciplined is to determine that you will never be late for anything in your life.’ Little wonder these guys are where they are. So, here we go. Out!, you demon of lateness and time unconsciousness.

So this year, I wanna buy me a car. Not just any car o, THAT car. I’ll leave this gist till December. I’ll be back with pictures.

I want to forgive, deliberately. Thank God for God. I don’t hurt easily but I hurt deeply and forgiveness is always an issue. I’ve been praying about this and just this year, I’ve been betrayed and the wound was so deep I thought to myself, ‘I can’t take this’ but I chose to forgive. I just decided to try it out and I realized it is not as difficult as I thought. Another lesson learnt here is when you pray for something, be ready to do your part. How else would God have shown me He was at work in me as regards forgiveness if someone did not hurt me? That way, I had to choose between forgiveness and holding on to the anger and hurt. So in 2015, I choose to walk in forgiveness.

I also want to be able to say I forgive my parents, especially my mum, and mean it. I want to forget about all the things they did not do right and focus on the ones they did well. I want to thank God every day for the blessing of a beautiful family.

I will be serious with my health this year. I’m shedding off some weight and it’s goodbye to the fries and everything unhealthy, including my beloved Ice Tea. I already registered in a gym for weekend workouts.

I will take my writing seriously this year. Excellence they say is not an act but a habit, we are what we repeatedly do. Commitment to my blog schedule is a must. I blog at bukola.okunola.wordpress.com and the blog is centered on my faith. I do mostly articles but this year, I will try out poetry and short stories. God is at work in me and yes, I’m doing this.

I plan to see at least 3 places new places this year. This was inspired by Frances of imperfectlyperfectlives.com. Thank you Frances, I’ll be back with my report.

I also have this ‘thing’ for young girls. It is an avenue where we meet, talk, share and learn. I believe if young girls are empowered with the truth, they will be able to stand tall and be all they were created to be. It breaks my heart to see young girls go after married men. I hope to start this year. I really hope so.

Patience Lord! I’m learning to take life, one day at a time. Patience Dear Lord, I pray thee.

My sisters and I will be having our Girls Night Out every month. Nah, marriage will not take that from me.

I want be a better friend. I want to reach out to people, I will not take the people in my life for granted this year. I will call and/text my friends once in a while, just to say hi.

I plan to get more casuals, enough of the dresses, pants and skirts. Jeans is the way to go in 2015. I also plan to make use of all them fine shoes that I use just for decoration.

Read! I want to expand my knowledge base. I know what I know, but I want to know more. I plan to leave my comfort zone this year and try out new books.

I love multiple births. I have triplet siblings and I love-for lack of a better word-love them. So before the end of this year, I want to be pregnant with my twins. If you can pray for me, biko pray o, whatever you can do, do. Twins it is mehn.

So, Le Hubs has this exam to write this year, I will support him in everything and yes, he will come out in flying colours.

I plan to ENJOY my marriage, in every sense of the word.

In conclusion, I want to know God more. I want to experience Him in a new dimension this year. ‘Oceans’ by Hillsong sums it up.

“…Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my saviour.”

God is at work in me, supplying the strength to do these things. Yes, I can.

So help me God.

Thank you Tokunbo for this platform. Chukwu gozie gi.