What do you have in store for me? We really need to sit down and talk about these things because honestly, I don’t exactly want a 2017 kind of year.
2017 was that ‘almost there’ year. Did he tell you about it? Did he tell you how everything was looking beautiful for a while? Did he tell you that I somehow got to see three African places that are not Ife and Ibadan and even though I really just passed through Togo and Benin Republic, I chose to add them to Ghana as ‘the countries I’ve been in’? Don’t judge me. It’s too early to start that nonsense.
I wonder though, did 2017 tell you the story of how I almost loved but even that was ripped away because ‘genotype and we can’t afford to go down that road’? The good thing, though, is I did feel a little something finally. One whose after effect should last a while because really, not all of us would get to live happily ever after in love at the end of the day. Happily ever after is just some nonsense these writers have coined so we can still be hopeful.
These writers. Haha. I’m supposed to be one of ‘these writers’. But somehow between procrastination and the feeling of not being good enough, I’m still not quite there yet. Missed deadlines. Unfinished work. Unsubmittted pieces. These are only some of the blankets I wrapped myself in to hide one truth; I don’t think I’m good enough.
Oh and how could I not ask if 2017 gave you the gist of that last stunt it pulled two days before mum’s memorial? That hard, tiny little lump I felt in my breast that reminded me of what took mum. And my aunt. And my grandma. That tiny lump I still haven’t figured what to do about because what’s the use, really?
Listen to me 2018, if you have unwanted bad surprises lying in wait for me, you better fix up. These eyes have cried all they can and I doubt there’s still a tear left. And no matter what it is you plan to throw at me, be rest assured I will rise.
2018, you know what they say about collaborations? How they work to make achieving things easier? That’s what I’m throwing at you. I’m using the strength in numbers to fine tune you, sir.
I want to help my friends with their goals this year. It might not be much but even if it’s just collating these goals and constantly reminding them to push for them, then by all means I will. At least I’d know I’ve help someone do something useful with you, 2018. And maybe in helping them, I’d be helping myself achieve my own goals, however little.
2018, you will be the year of actual self-development, not pretend self-development. That means volunteering more, learning French, learning everything. Work might interfere. Cash flow might want to disrupt our plan but by the time you are packing your bags to leave I will be able to say more than ‘C’est le moment. Le moment du faire La fete’ I want to have read at least 80 books this year. The Read Club helped out with reading last year as well as meeting amazing people. So 2018, get ready for more with TRC.
When you rolled your bags in, Femi asked if I knew what I was going to do first quarter of this year. And then like he knew I’d say something silly, he added,“You will get another job. The kind that you deserve right?” That’s all the wake-up call I need. So yeah, we’re doing that too. Getting the job I deserve, which is really one of three things; a book editor job, a writing job that allows me more creative freedom and/or a radio gig.
So here’s the plan;
- Find a job as an editorial assistant in a book publishing company and start from there.
- Get training in radio presenting and voice over artistry and start looking for internships at least.
- Continue recording audiobooks
Please, 2018, let’s write more. Let’s enter for these writing contests. It doesn’t really matter if we win right now. All that would matter is that we took the first step in submitting. We can battle winning later. Because I know we might drag each other behind a little, I’m engaging friends in this thing. Friends I’ll write with. Friends that will push me to write. Friends that will fight me if I don’t enter for contests. Oh and we’re creating a Medium account, sir.
I’m moving to a 10 dress-size whether you like it or not. I’m starting a weight loss challenge this month. Here’s how it works; interested people holla at me (for free of course), we start motivating each to lose the holiday weight (and some), we keep doing this at regular intervals throughout the year. United we get shredded.
And finally, 2018, I will go out more. With people. Without people. To parties. To exhibitions. To whatever. My social life is non-existent. We need to fix that. And we need to live a more YOLO life.
Ready to go on this journey with me? Hey, it’s not like either of us has got that much of a choice. We’re kicking it together.
Captain of her soul.